Our Adoption Adventure

2006-10-16T20:34:00.000-05:00

UPDATE

If anyone is still watching this sight I am still here and sheer bliss prevails! This baby is the best baby in the world! She is happy all the time. She loves every food we give her, she sleeps all night and we have to wake her up in the morning....she is way ahead on everything she is supposed to be doing and she can light up a room with her smile. She doesn't meet a stranger and people LOVE her. She has only been sick one time and it was about 4 hours of throwing up and drinking pedialite....What more could I ask for? What more could we want? I love every day....not if we could just win the lottery......

2006-09-06T21:18:00.000-05:00

BACK TO WORK
I did go back and it's going great - after i cried a few days. The babysitter is a nurse and does so many things with the children (only two right now). Sweetcakes loves her too.....if it can't be me it HAS to be someone great, sweet, patient and kind. I think We found that.

2006-09-06T20:52:00.000-05:00

SHE IS A WEED!!!!

My little sweetcakes has been growing so fast I can't keep up. I put away all the 0-3 months and all of a sudden all the 3-6 months clothes don't fit. I spent $70 last month and bought a whole wardrobe for next summer - 12 month size-----i think I'll have to sell them all. She is 17 pounds and 25 inches long and getting longer and heavier by the week.
She sleeps through the night, she doesn't spit up, she poops once a day (adult looking little poops) and she's happy all the time ---i don't think she's a real baby....maybe a robot. She's so wonderful I pinch myself. She DOES cry but only when she's really hungry or very tired. And I know I am bias but I have had others tell me too - she is one of the most beautiful babies. I know I thought that but we feel like celebrities when we take her anywhere because people stop us all the time to comment on her looks.
She is wonderful and we are so happy. I want to keep her a baby forever and I want to see wheat she will be like at 1, 2, 3, 16, 20.....it will happen soon enough but I LOVE her being a baby------so sweet!

We are BLESSED BLESSED BLESSED.

2006-08-21T22:35:00.000-05:00

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY

I LOVE being a mom. I LOVE our baby....she is a wonderful, wonderful, sweet girl. She is the most friendly happy little baby.....so alert and personable. She wakes up smiling and doesn't stop (except when she is hungry or tired). She started at thebabysitter today and I HATE letting her be somewhere else for 9 houes a day ---I'm missing her life a little and I've cried every day. When she comes home she sleeps....i know that won't last forever but i want to keep her awake so I can be with her. I already took off Friday because I can't stand it...............

All in all I can't help but love our new life............She is incredible and we love her SO MUCH!

2006-08-04T08:52:00.000-05:00

SO HAPPY

Can you be so blissfully happy and exhausted and sad (about going back to work) all at the same time??

I cannot imagine life without this baby. She is sunshine and light and sweetness and God's greatest thing ever.....He made her so perfect and then gave her to us....it's more than I can stand really.

She is such a happy girl, she smiles and everyone is enchanted. The sparkle in her eye when she smiles - you know she means it....she is just happy for being. This morning she was awake and lying there. It's 5:30 (yuck) and I looked over at her. She is wide awake and looks at me and grins with the biggest gummy grin and my heart just melted. It takes everything in my not to burst out with pride and joy. She has found her hands and chews on them, found her toes and stares at them (those will be the next in her mouth if she figures out how) and she is talking constantly with the cutest coos....whole conversations mind you. She sings with us and especially like Johnny Cash Ring of Fire----who knew? Maybe her birthmother saw the movie a bunch of times - ????

I could go on and on and usially do but I'm sorry I have not had too much time to write....will try to be better.

GOD IS SO GOOD

2006-07-17T21:34:00.000-05:00

COMPLETE

I am exhausted, rushed and haven't really been able to take a shower or shave my legs.....But I feel the best I have felt in ----well, forever! I feel complete and my husband is so sweet and so in love with our sweet baby. Nothing in life has ever been this wonderful. I want to stay home with her forever and be with her all the time.....

2006-06-19T12:50:00.000-05:00

I'm A 10 day - Official Mommy

We've had our little girl home for 10 days and it's hard to imagine what our life was without her. I love everything about this little person who has ivaded every thought, every move we make. She so sweet, and incredibly beautiful, I can't imagine loving her any more than I do. T is an awesome daddy and talks so sweet to her. God has looked down on us with favor, He has blessed us so abundantly and I am so icredibly grateful!!!!!

2006-06-03T23:20:00.000-05:00

My Girl

I Love the way that sounds. Daddy calls her "his sweetheart". I call her "sweet pea". She is the most precious little thing and we love her so much. I wonder how I will do anything because I don't want to put her down! She is the perfect child.....she only poops once a day, never spits up and sleeps through the night.....what a baby!! I can't wait for everyone to see her and love her as much as we do. They already love her---so many people wishing us well, offering us furniture and clothes and babysitting....God has blessed us with so many friends. I can't wait to get her at the end of next week. Visiting is so hard because then you have to hand them back.....she felt so right in my arms, right where she should be......

2006-05-27T01:17:00.000-05:00

We are Going to Be a Mommy and Daddy!

I don't believe it, My boss this morning said to me "you have kids you can give these crayons to?". I said, "thanks a lot, are you trying to rub it in?".....I was sort of joking but he got all sad and said he didn't mean it. I said I knew, i was just kidding him. He put his hands on the back of my shoulders and said "good things are going to happen to you". Not one hour later the phone rang and it was THE CALL!! I couldn't have been more stunned, more happy or more petrified all at the same time! I made notes as I was given the information but I was so shaky I couldn't even read them. I remembered though - how could i forget those wonderful words. All about our daughter.....i love the sound of that.....our daughter. God is good......all of the time!

PS-- I told my boss to grab my shoulders again and say "You will win the lottery" so he did it but added " and you will share it with me...." lol

2006-05-25T22:42:00.000-05:00

And Then There Were Two

Well, there were three Profiles to show the last girl looking. She wanted someone Catholic so we were not someone she was interested in. I guess now there are only two profiles left until the ones working on them get finished. This will happen when we least expect it I think....

2006-05-01T11:21:00.000-05:00

NO MORE MOTHER'S DAY ADS!!!

I hate mother's day.....well, not really because I love to honor my mother and mother-in-law--but I hate that it's coming and I am still not a mother myself! I have no sweet child to slobber kisses on my face or doodle a sweet little home-made card or try to make me breakfast with daddy. These commercials are killing me....I want it all......

However, I was reminded at church about trials this Sunday....I hate trials.....but who likes them? I sure there are some misguided oddballs out there who enjoys the hardships but not me. I know they come but please don't say i should enjoy them.....
The title of my post was going to be...

JOY IN THE JOURNEY

see how far I moved from that to hating mother's day? Pretty sad.
We all go through difficult things, Christian or not. It's the joy from within that is our saving grace (literally). God promised we would have joy in the journey not happines or wealth or even security in the worldly things - only in Him. Joy is that "thing" that is deep within that assures us there is hope with Jesus-Not the giggles or the feeling of happiness or the rush of adrenaline. It's difficult to imagine that as a Christian we can have worse trials than if we did not follow Jesus. But rest assured - you probably will. That is the nature of satan and ther result of sin. We WILL have trials. okay - enough telling myself that it's normal.
So what does this mean? well, the journey of faith is not easy---it is tested. But God is faithful and full of grace! We are called to do difficult things. but if waiting for a child is one of the worst and hardest things God will put on us then we are blessed!!
For now I am looking up, looking to the sky and not on my life... I am trusting and I am full of hope. I have joy in my journey............it is a journey that I know will come to an end in an AWESOME destination!

2006-04-25T12:37:00.000-05:00

The Unknown Soldier

I always have heard about the "tomb of the unknown soldier". I guess there are quite a few around the country and maybe even around the world. It's sad to think that these men fell for our happiness and we don't know who they are.

I feel a little the same when I pray for "the girl" (that's how have to refer to her in my prayers) that will give up her child for our family to be happy. We pray for a nameless, faceless girl who either already knows or will know soon that she is going to have a baby. She'll have to go through alot of soul searching and probably a lot of tears and fears before coming to total strangers to help her find other total strangers to take her baby. This is a weird thing to think about and even weirder to pray about.

Of course we pray for a baby of our own to raise and love and cherish. But when I pray for us I can't help pray for everyone involved and that includes the baby and the mother. I think our lives and the life of the baby will be happy but I pray for that girl too and the whole thing is bittersweet.

I know I can live without thinking about her most of the time however I know she will always be in the back of my mind. I don't ever want to forget to pray for her and whatever her life will bring.........God, bless her..........

2006-04-20T09:29:00.000-05:00

While Waiting:

A great qoute from Dr. Dobson:

“My concern is that many believers apparently feel God owes them smooth
sailing or at least a full explanation (and perhaps an apology) for the
hardships they encounter. We must never forget that He, after all, is
God. He is majestic and holy and sovereign. He is accountable to no
one. He is not an errand boy who chases the assignments we dole out.
He is not a genie who pops out of the bottle to satisfy our whims. He is
not our servant - we are His. And our reason or existence is to glorify
and honor Him. Even so, sometimes He performs mighty miracles on our
behalf. Sometimes He chooses to explain His action in our lives.
Sometimes His presence is as real as if we had encountered Him face to
face. But at other times, when nothing makes sense- when what we are going
through is ‘not fair,’ when we feel all alone in God’s waiting room - He simply
says, ‘Trust Me.’” James Dobson

2006-04-06T14:57:00.000-05:00

More Babies

There are alot of ladies checking in with the agency.....I pray that God places the right cildren with the right parents and the mothers are at peace with their decision. The problem is, as far as our situation, most of the girls want a fully open adoption. I understand their point of view--i guess I would too. We are not %100 opposed to it but we also don't want to say yes to that right off the bat.....it would only work if it were the right match.....I can't believe people would agree to a fully open adoption without even knowing how everyone will get along.....
We are leaving it all in God's hands...........

2006-04-03T11:29:00.000-05:00

Lots of Babies

I e-mailed the agency to see what was happening over there. They have been very busy with babies being born and placed. I love to hear that they are busy (for selfish reasons) but it's also sad to know there are so many young girls out there unable to parent. Adoption is really a double edged sword.

Once when, I was in my early 20s, i had dinner with a girl that grew up across the street from me. We had been friends because of convienience really but we hadn't seen eachother in a long time and she wanted to show off her rich husband. She had married the guy who was to inherit the family business. The only thing is - his family owned quite a few funeral parlors in our city. I remember her saying at the time that they "loved to hear the scream of the ambulances down the street....it meant more business". It was meant to be a joke but I found it tasteless. How could anyone like that other people were suffering for their benefit? In a way I feel bad praying for someone to want to place their child for the same reason. I know it's a little different but I don't like the fact that one person has to give something precious up for our sake. God our Father, in His infinite wisdom, knows us and knows our hearts. He also knows I would never want to hurt someone so that our lives could be better......

2006-03-30T21:46:00.000-06:00

All Sorts of Situations

We had talked about open adoption and we thought we could not agree right away to a totally open adoption. There's always a possiblity that it would work out if we all met and agreed on something a little more open, but it would have to be right. There is also the situation about drug use. We have sort of taken everything "as it comes". I would rather not think too far in advance and think of all the bad situations that could be presented. I did look up about Meth use and I think that's dangerous for the baby. But what about other drugs.....anyone know? I guess marjuana isn't something too serious if used moderately during pregnancy.....but I don't know. This is what I copied from a website:

Unless you smoke in excess of three grams a day (6-10 joints)
It is very unlikely you will damage your unborn baby.

is that true?? What other drugs and what do they do?? What about mental illness? Are mental illnesses genetic? I guess I shouldn't wait until these things come up but I sure hate looking up all these things....it's very depressing to think of all thie things that could be wrong.....we have put this in God's hands, but i guess it is important to be informed...........

Anyone know about all this or have a good website with all the info??

2006-03-26T22:47:00.000-06:00

A Surreal Life

Life in this phase is weird. Did I dream doing all of the paperwork? It feels like we did the fingerprinting and things so long ago. It's just all so surreal.

The lady that helped us with the loan at the bank is so excited about us adopting - she asks everytime we see her "aren't your excited?" And everytime i say "not yet" --I've been waiting too long and I've learned not to get excited. I think once that baby is on the way and we have been picked I will get excited....I want to be thrilled and expectant and excited but I'm holding myself back. T's the same way....he's got a delayed emotion problem anyway. I kid him about when I called him in 1986 (we had just started dating) and told him his sister was going to have a baby. I was thrilled and barely knew her. He wasn't excited about it until he first held the baby in his arms and realized it was for real. It's the same for this situation. It's not real yet.

We are praying for the girl who is faceless and nameless. Praying for her health and health of the baby. Praying that she comes to know the love of Christ. Praying she makes her decision out of love and that she can be happy. It's a double edged sword. We pray for a baby - but that is a child that a mother must give up....

For now we wait............I hope it's not too long!

2006-03-20T08:48:00.000-06:00

Long St. Paddy's Day Weekend!

Friday we went to a party at someone's house that goes to school with T at the seminary. They were all SO young... but fun. They had the best corned beef I've ever had (don't tell my mother) and we played this fun card game called President and Janitor (or something like that) . I would have had more fun If I could Stop coughing and blowing my nose - and BREATH (i forgot how wonderful it is to breath out of my nose).

I felt much better having fun on Friday night after I talked to my mom and Dad got through the surgery really well. The Polyp was the size of a quarter but they think they got it before it spread. He's relieved it's over and the catheter is out - YIKES! Pathology will tell if more has to be done - We are praying for NO cancer to be found!!!

Saturday night we took the Iraqi girls to "Indian Night" at our church. It was fun for them to be with a lot of people but the food was too HOT for them - lol. They loved it and talked with everyone as if they have always known them. I think people are attracted to them - they are so pretty and exotic looking - they had a GREAT time and so did we. It's great that they love our church and the people in it. When they get older, they will remember these people, their kindness that something about them that they are attracted to....and I hope one day will become Christians.

Sunday we went to church and then out to lunch, shopping and then to church again......whew! our lives are so busy!

Every night I lay down I used to pray until i fell asleep---now I can't help but think about having a child in the house and how that will change everything. I am preoccupied during the day - but really start thinking about it at night when my eyes are wide open waiting to fall asleep.....
Sometimes it just seems like something i hope and pray for that will never happen.

2006-03-15T14:02:00.000-06:00

No News Is Not Always Good News

I have not heard anything from the agency for a few weeks. These dry spells will kill me - i wonder how long our wait will be. This is a small agency so there isn't a lot of traffic. For some reason it was the only agency that interested us so we really felt God leading us to use this place. The people there were very nice and personable and knows you when you e-mail or call. They wouldn't have to look up your file to find out who you were before answering back. So we wait.......

Meanwhile, my dad will get operated on. He will go in on Friday to get a Polyp taken off of his bladder. It is most likely cancer but you never know how bad the cancer is. It can be very treatable but we won't know until after Friday so I am praying!!

2006-03-09T15:14:00.000-06:00

Top 10 Things I Resolve to do as a Parent

I found this on another blog and adapted it to myself----

Top 10 things I resolve to Do as a Parent

1. I will throw birthday parties after the child is 5 requiring me to play games and purchase gifts for all small children in attendance.

2. I will kick my child outside on nice days. Despite the fact that I watched way more Mr. Rogers and Sesame Street than the average child I did play outside on a regular basis.

3. I will give my child every opportunity to think for himself.

4. Much to my chagrin, if my son/daughter wants to play a sport we don't understand I will let him/her. (don't think we won't try to talk him/her into soccer first)

5. I will make every attempt possible not to give in to whining. Even if this causes stink eye from the old ladies and other mommies in the grocery store.

6. I will expose my child to as many learning possibilities as he can handle.

7. I will be the adult in the house.

8. I will not be super sanitary mom. Kids are kids and meant to get dirty.

9. I will make sure that we are a family first and foremost. I do not want our child to take over the relationship that T and I have worked for nearly 20 years to build.

10. I will strive to be the best mom I know that I can be.

I am very aware that there are resolutions that we make as a parent that fly right out the window as soon as our children come home. Many of these will probably fit into that category

2006-03-07T08:34:00.000-06:00

Decisions, Decisions

There is a boy i know through someone at work who is going to jail. He drove after he had been drinking and he caused an accident that killed someone. He is sweet and young and stupid for doing what he did......now he is doomed in jail. If there were only a jail just for people like him....kids that make really bad decisions - i know he deserves punishment for taking a life but he will surely be tortured by those men in prison. He is 18 and already messed up because of the consequences of his actions. He is in for Goodness knows what....i pray that he will come out alive, and not psychologically damaged.

On top of everything - He made another mistake----his girlfriend is pregnant. I would adopt that baby in a minute if that was the plan..........oh what a few bad decisions can do...........

2006-03-04T20:34:00.000-06:00

I feel small

I write here because there aren't too many people to talk to about all this. We have decided not to tell too many people until there is a match. Just like with IF, i don't want a lot of people asking a lot of questions to which there are no answers. I thought this blog was anonymous enough that i could say just about anything.....i was wrong. I guess there are one or two too many people reading this blog. So, i can't say what i'd like - all of it still must remain private, hidden, secret. Too much of my life if a secret but i guess for some that does not matter.....
For now we wait.....now in more silence. Praying for a nameless, faceless, hidden girl who will want to place her child with us. It's a deadly calm, a stillness that breaks my heart. A feeling like being in a boat with no land to see, no movement on the water and just the buzzing in my ears to occupy me.

2006-03-01T22:42:00.000-06:00

Google Earth

I have discovered Google earth and LOVE IT! It's pretty clear for being free----I went to London and followed our path all over. Where we got off the train, walking to the London EYE and around and past Big Ben, Parliment, Westmister Abby - SO COOL! I showed T St. Paul's Cathedral and where he stood while M and I walked over to a quickymart and got some yummy almond cakes and juice. I think we got some salt and vinegar chips too - i really wish they had more of those here! The freaky thing is to type in your address when you are somewhere like London -- you are wisked up in the air and the world turns and focuses you back on a spot and zooms in on your house - wild! For $20 a year you can get more clear.

The way i found out about this is through my friend from Iraq. He pulled up Google earth, typed in a city in Iraq and - BAM--I was there, looking at all the buildings etc. He pointed out where he was almost killed in the Civil war when a group of Bath party thugs started throwing hand grenades and spraying them with a machine gun---he "almost bit that Iraqi dust" He said (in such an American way). He is flying to Iraq on Friday to be an interpreter........we are praying for his safe return in six months!!!!

2006-02-28T09:37:00.000-06:00

Life is a Mexican Restaurant

The pastor talked about it on Sunday morning and i can't get it out of my head. Life is a Mexican Restaurant.....

You go in thinking of the burrito you really love, it looks so good on the plate when they bring it and it tastes so wonderful, you'r mouth is watering. But, you have to wait for it - and in the meantime there are lots of chips and salsa and even though it's not the best thing for you and they are not the best chips and salsa you've ever had, you eat them and talk and eat some more. You eat them until the chips are gone and you are picking at the crums. You ask the waiter to bring even more chips and not to forget to fill up the salsa as well.....it's like eating one potato chip. Twenty minutes later your beautiful burrito is brought out to you, it's freshly made, hot and delicious----except you are stuffed with chips and salsa and there is no room for what you were waiting for.

We are waiting for an answer from God, we are waiting for God to show us what He wants from us - but we have to wait. We fill our lives with so many distractions and for so long that by the time God is showing us what we should do or what He wants from us we are to full of the small nonsensical stuff to really want it.....

2006-02-21T09:46:00.000-06:00

Hurry Up and Wait!

I resisted this long in e-mailing the agency to ask what, if anything, was happening there. The mothers all picked someone else this time......we already knew that really. There are a "couple of mothers" in the process but not ready to look at profiles. I am still wondering of i should change anything in ours. Does it really matter that it is not perfect? Does it matter that i didn't mention we both sing? Sing together? Sing all the time, all over the house? Why didn't i mention that? Okay - if this is meant to be - they are not going to care about all that right???? right????

Oh, and we didn't win the lottery.....i guess you know that by now. Lincoln, Nebraska?? Why never here?? Why never me???

2006-02-16T10:46:00.000-06:00

I WIN, I WIN!! (I WISH)

I used to say "if i ever won the lottery i wouldn't tell anyone but i would drive into the middle of Iowa somewhere and call everyone i know to tell them i had broken down and need their help--please come get me" Anyone that showed up would get $20,000." But you know, i've told that to so many people - i'm afraid they would all come - but not for the right reasons. I'm going to have to revise my strategy........

What would you do if you won? Would you scream? faint? be in shocked silence? cry? jump up and down?---I would probably do a combination of them all..... oh................ wouldn't it be loverly??????????

2006-02-12T23:50:00.000-06:00

Words of Wisdom

"Every experience God gives us, every person He puts in our lives is the perfect preperation that only He can see" Corrie Ten Boom

I love that the people adopting from China has the red thread and the lady bug as a sort of symbol. It unites then somehow and they have a visable image of their journey.

"An invisible red thread connects those destined to meet, regarless of time, place or circumbstance. The thread may stretch or tangle but never breaks" A Chinese proverb

The lady bug has no background in Chinese culture or history. A few years ago when many people were adopting from China there was a fall when the ladybug population grew unsually large. This was thought ot be a luck charm to those who were adopting,so now when lady bugs are seen, it is said that more beautiful chinese babies are being adopted. Is it like "whenever a bell rings an agel gets it's wings"?

Still, all the adopted parents need some sort of symbol, button, ribbon or something.......I'll think about that one......

2006-02-12T22:10:00.000-06:00

Zero to Newborn in Sixty Seconds

We want to be picked!!! I want everyone to love us, think we would be awesome parents, look at our profile and refuse to see any more.....

I e-mailed the social worker to ask about how long we would have to wait - what the adverage was....she wrote:

"The wait in the caucasion program varies widely from folks getting selected the first time or two their profile are shown (rare) to a couple of years."

The agency's "longest wait" couple just got picked after almost two years. TWO YEARS!!!!?????
After waiting twelve ----two more shouldn't seem that long------ but it's an eternity..................

2006-02-12T14:12:00.000-06:00

Face Your Fear

Someone reminded me today that we are all afraid. Everyone is afraid of something. To quote my friend, she said:

Everyone should skydive naked into the pulpit

It's funny but The point was well taken. On the list ofthe top 10 things people fear are skydiving, being naked in public and public speaking. Now I am NOT telling people to do any of these things, especially the three that were spoken, but I do think we need to sometimes take a step of faith and do things that we are afraid of......think about a few things that make you afraid, nerveous, uncomfortable. Things that you should be able to do but can't make yourself.

DO THEM!!

2006-02-10T17:58:00.000-06:00

Adoption is Biblical

We already have heard the story of Moses - I think that was the first open adoption. His mother lived with the family and nursed him, took care of him etc. for the adopted mother.....

but a fellow blogger reminded me today of Psalm 113:

Halleluia
You who serve God, praise God.
Just to speak His name is praise.
Just to remember God is a blessing, now and tommorro and always.
From East to west, from dawn to dusk, keep lifting all your praise to God.
God is higher than anything and anyone, outshining everything you can see in the skies.
Who can compair with God, our God, who is so majestically enthroned,
surverying His most magnificent heavens and earth?
He picks up the poor from out of the dirt,
rescues the wretched who has been thrown out with the trash,
seats them among the honored guests, a place of honor among the brightest and best,
He Gives Childless couples a family,
gives them joy as the parents of children.
Halleluia

Amen I say, and again i say Amen!!!

2006-02-10T08:25:00.000-06:00

Adopted Mothers are Like Turtles

NAIROBI (AFP) - A baby hippopotamus that survived the tsunami waves on the Kenyan coast has formed a strong bond with a giant male century-old tortoise, in an animal facility in the port city of Mombassa , officials said.

The hippopotamus, nicknamed Owen and weighing about 300 kilograms (650 pounds), was swept down Sabaki River into the Indian Ocean , then forced back to shore when tsunami waves struck the Kenyan coast on December 26, before wildlife rangers rescued him.

"It is incredible. A-less-than-a-year-old hippo has adopted a male tortoise, about a century old, and the tortoise seems to be very happy with being a 'mother'," ecologist Paula Kahumbu, who is in charge of Lafarge Park , told AFP. "After it was swept away and lost its mother, the hippo was traumatized. It had to look for something to be a surrogate mother. Fortunately , it landed on the tortoise and established a strong bond. They swim, eat and sleep together," the ecologist added. "The hippo follows the tortoise exactly the way it follows its mother. If somebody approaches the tortoise, the hippo becomes aggressive, as if protecting its biological mother," Kahumbu added. "The hippo is a young baby, he was left at a very tender age and by nature, hippos are social animals that like to stay with their mothers for four years," he explained.

This is a real story that shows that our differences don't matter much when we need the comfort of another . We could all learn a lesson from these two creatures of God - Look beyond the differences and find a way to walk the path together.

2006-02-09T18:31:00.000-06:00

I'm NOT a Writer!

Heard from our adoption social worker. We have NOT been picked as far as she knows. Because we want only semi-open and i'm going to be working It may take longer. Only one potential mother made comments about our profile---she felt that there were many typos but when the other councilor questioned it she only came up with a few monor things like spaces where she didn't think there should be a space. I'm not a writer, and I definetly don't claim to be......yikes - another thing in which I'm not good enough!

2006-02-08T22:23:00.000-06:00

Like Not Getting Picked For American Idol

First of all, I don't mean to diminish the importance of being picked by a biomom--let me say that first.

You know how all the people on American Idol REALLY think they can sing? And then it hurts them so much when they are not picked? Someone who really sees them for what they really are turns them down - telling them they are NOT the best! That's how I am feeling. I guess I thought the two biomoms, looking at our profile, would both want us and the agency would have to decide who wanted us first--that would be the only fair way. But we haven't heard anything....how could they not think we would be the best parents for their baby?----what's wrong with us? What haven't we put into our profile that would convince them and show them how loving, honest, caring and bubbly we are??? I grin but tear up as i type this - I'm sort of totally serious!!?? What have they got that we haven't?----more money? A bigger house? other kids? ..........It's the stay at home thing isn't it??? Well???? What is it??????

2006-02-06T14:50:00.000-06:00

Confusious say.....

I don't go much in for fortune cookies but they are fun - once T got a fortune that read

"You are the best person in the world"

he waved that thing around and showed it to everyone we saw for the next week. Then, strangely enough, he got the same one again a few months later. No one we know has ever gotten that at the restaurant we have eatedn at for 15 years! He is now a firm believer in forune cookies!! LOL

Okay, so were having lunch on T's birthday last week and we both got a cookie. His read

"Prosperity will knock on your door soon"

and mine read:

"Your dearest desire will come true"

The two things that we are desperately hoping for - more money and a little baby!!! I believe, i believe... lol

2006-02-04T12:30:00.000-06:00

What's the Deal??

This blogging thing is intersting. I post for myself and really only for one person I know (hi K!)
Other people that i don't know read also - following along. I have a number of blogs I look at almost daily. But what gets me is the comment thing. I have made comments - honestly, like the bloggers try to be in their posts. But my "honest" opinion, not disrespectful or foul, will not get put onto the post because I guess it is in disagreement with the blogger. Strange, I will almost let anything be said except foul language or advertisement on my blog. Not as much for me but for other people reading. I want people that read my blog to see all the comments made - not just the ones that make me look right. Everyone has their opinions about this process.....so be it. Honesty?? ha

2006-02-02T17:28:00.000-06:00

No More Christmas

I am taking down our Christmas tree tonight. The ornaments have been off for weeks but T likes to turn on the lights and look at it at night... I told him the neighbors are going to see it in the window and think we are either crazy or lazy......It's sad to take it down though. It's so dark in our house and it provides such a nice light. We contimplated leaving it up and decorating for each holiday....that was short lived (remember what i said about the neighbors).

I thought by now we would have at least a lead on a mother and have a child on it's way. This process is long and tedious. The wait could drive people crazy. At least before it was a 2 week wait then a let down for the next two - like a roller coaster----this is just waiting.................

2006-02-02T17:17:00.000-06:00

Just Me Ranting and Raving

I don't know why I thought we would have already been called and told that one of the two girls would want us to be the parents for their child. I just imagined it to be too difficult to pass us up. Boy I'm concieted! Yesterday I took out the copy of our profile and looked at it as thought I didn't know us - like I was a mother ready to have their child in March. .....We looked ridiculous. I left things out!!!! It doesn't say we like to sing or sing together.....It does say T likes to write music - big deal - the idiots on American Idol who cannot sing on key all write music too.....ARG. It doesn't show our love, our compasion, our sense of humor.....that people like us, especially children. How do you show that in 9 pages? We are not writers, we are not adcertising agents (although i did go to school for that for a while). We needed to hire someone to put together our profile!!!

Why not us? What's wrong with us? How could you look at our profile and not think we are the best? Those other profiles were boring, the people not attractive (here I go being concieted again).....why not us???? We are unique, we are happy together, we like different things. Is it because we don't hunt? Don't like to camp or swim in lakes? Did we mention that even??? Do you not like taht I won't be at home?? How many women can do that? We are poor if i don't work - you want that???? ARGGGGGGGGGG.......why hasn't anyone called and told us they want us???????

2006-02-01T15:27:00.000-06:00

I am hurt, sad, upset and angry

A boy that works where I do is 18, in Pharmacy school and going to have a baby with his girlfried - URG! Another boy who is 18 was just best man at his friend's wedding. He is also 18 and getting married because she is pregnant. The university in which they attend is making them marry so they can live together (something they would not allow without a certificate).

Okay, what are these kids doing? Could they not consider adoption?? Why are they doing this to themselves? It all just makes me mad!

2006-02-01T15:23:00.000-06:00

?????????????????

I got an e-mail from the agency - all the waiting parents got one but i felt it may be directed towards me. I should not have listed the information below maybe. I didn't list names - just first initial. I want to keep a log of what happens - what i know - what i hear about it all. Why can't i list this information? I am careful not to put all info in. I hope this e-mail was directed to someone else.

2006-01-25T15:08:00.000-06:00

Holy Poop Batman!

I bought my first package of diapers last night. I was at the grocery store and thought "what if they call us and tell us there is a baby to go get at the hospital" (don't laugh it could happen). I thought we could get by without a lot of things but that isn't one of them. I was SHOCKED! 10.99 for 40 diapers. I think i'll make my own wipes - there's a recipe where you cut a roll of papertowels in half and put it in a liquid that you make up and put into a tupperware container. My word - what you pay for convienience!

2006-01-23T11:33:00.000-06:00

OH MY!!!!

I am so nerveous in my stomach now.......a good nerveous but butterflies galore!
We sent off the profiles on Friday and today, Monday, I was running a "fix" on my computer when i saw an Email come in entitled "the profiles are in"..... I had to wait 45 minutes to open it but this is what it said......

P,
Just wanted to let you know that we received your profiles and I distributed them to the various birthparent counselors today. Just in time, too. We have three birthmoms due in March who will be selecting families soon. Now all you have to do is hurry up and wait! God bless, S

YIKES!!!!!

2006-01-20T22:15:00.000-06:00

Mailed it all off today................yikes!

2006-01-14T21:10:00.000-06:00

DONE....but not finished

3 1/2 hours and $300 later, I am done with the copies of the profile. I went into Kinkos and the girl said nicely that she could not copy them because there were a few professional pictures. I was going to be very upset but she did say i could color-copy them myself so i did---79 double sided sheets (so i actually was dealing with 158 copies). Then she said i could laminate them all myself ---that was cool because i could do it all myself and make sure it was exactly how i wanted it. The laminating makes it look SO good ---then they used a spiral....so professional! The girl was SO nice and said a lot of people do their profiles at Kinkos....but ours looked the best she has seen. She said they usually have a great cover and back page but the middle is boring. Ours, she said, was great on the inside and made us look "fun". I hope thats a good thing....lol. ("i don't want them to have my baby, they look like they have too much fun and would let the baby wander away.....")

This morning we went in to sign the papers for the loan and the woman found a mistake in the percentage of the interest so she must do them all over. Now we can't sign the papers until Tuesday and not get the money until the end of next week - delays delays! ARG
as soon as the money is in the back we will write the big check for all the porfiles to be sent in and then we will be shown!!!!! woooopie

We opened up a checking account for the baby----all the loan money will go in there and money we will start to put into it every month once the loan is paid off----watch out,k it's a college fund!!!!!

2006-01-09T14:13:00.000-06:00

READY......SET........

Okay - all i have to do now is get 6 copies of the profile done and we'll close on our loan on Saturday January 14th ---it all gets shipped off with $4500.00 and the waiting begins. The agency said the corrections were okay and we're ready to go.........
YIKES!

2006-01-05T15:03:00.000-06:00

FAMOUS

Adopted Persons

Andy Berlin - entrepreneur: chairman of Berlin Cameron & PartnersAnthony Williams - politicianAristotle - philosopherArt Linkletter - comedianBo Diddley - musician, performerBuffy Sainte-Marie - musician, actressCarl-Theodor Dreyer - Danish film directorCharlotte Anne Lopez - Miss Teen USAChristina Crawford - authorClarissa Pinkola Estes - authorCrazy Horse - Lakota war chiefDan O'Brien - decathleteDaunte Culpepper - football playerDave Thomas - entrepreneur: founder of Wendy'sDebbie Harry - singerEdgar Allan Poe - poet, writerEdward Albee - playwrightEleanor Roosevelt - First LadyEric Dickerson - athleteFaith Daniels - news anchorFaith Hill - country singerFreddie Bartholomew - actorGeorge Washington Carver - inventorGreg Louganis - athleteJames MacArthur - actorJames Michener - authorJean Jacques Rousseau - philosopherJesse Jackson - ministerJesus - adopted by Joseph the carpenter (Bible)Jett Williams - country singer and authorJim Palmer - athleteJohn J. Audubon - naturalistJohn Hancock - politicianJohn Lennon - musicianLangston Hughes - poet and writerLarry Ellison - entrepreneur: chief executive of OracleLee Majors - actorLeo Tolstoy - writerLes Brown - motivational speakerLynnette Cole - Miss USA 2000Malcolm X - civil rights leaderMark Acre - athleteMatthew Laborteaux - actorMelissa Gilbert - actressMichael Reagan - author, talk show hostMoses - Biblical leaderNancy Reagan - First LadyNat King Cole - singerNelson Mandela - politicianPatrick Labyorteaux - actorPeter and Kitty Carruthers - figure skatersPresident Gerald Ford - politicianPresident William Clinton - politicianPriscilla Presley - actressRay Liotta - actorReno - performance artist, comedianSarah McLachlan - singerScott Hamilton - figure skaterSen. Paull H. Shin - politicianSen. Robert Byrd - politicianSteve Jobs - entrepreneur: co-founder of Apple computerSurya Bonaly - figure skaterTim Green - football player/commentatorTim McGraw - country singerTom Monaghan - entrepreneurTommy Davidson - comedianVictoria Rowell - actressWilson Riles - educator

Birth Parents

Andy Kaufman - actorClark Gable - actorDavid Crosby - singerFaith Ireland - judgeHank Williams, Sr. - country music legendKate Mulgrew - actressJoni Mitchell - singerRoseanne Barr - actressMercedes Ruehl - actressStrom Thurmond - politician

Adoptive Parents

Al Roker - news anchorAlfre Woodard - actressAlexander the Great - King of Macedonia, 356-323 B.C.Angelina Jolie - actressArt Buchwald - comedianBarbara Walters - journalistBen Stein - actor and game show hostBette Davis - actress
Billy Bob Thornton - actor, writer, singerBob (and Delores) Hope - entertainerBrooke Adams - actressBurt Reynolds - actorCalista Flockhart - actressCecil B. De Mille - film directorCharles Bronson - actorChelsea Noble - actressConnie Chung - news anchorDale Evans - singerDan Marino - athleteDan Wilson - athleteDavid E. Kelley - television producerDiane Keaton - actressDianne Wiest - actressDonna Mills - actressEd McMahon - entertainerErma Bombeck - authorEstelle Parsons - actressEve Arden - actressFather George Clements - ministerGail Sheehy - writerGary Merrill - actorGeorge Burns - comedianGeorge Lucas - film directorGloria Swanson - actressGracie Allen - comedianHarpo Marx - actorHarry Belafonte - singerHedy Lamarr - actressHelen Hayes - actressHenry Fonda - actorIsabella Rossellini - -actressJamie Lee Curtis - actressJane Fonda - actressJane Wyman - actressJann Wenner - publisherJill Ireland - actressJill Krementz - authorJoBeth Williams - actressJoan Didion - authorJoan Fontaine - actressJohn DeLorean - entrepreneurJohn Denver - singerJohn Gregory Dunne - authorJosephine Baker - singer and dancerJudy Woodruff - news anchorJulie Andrews - actressKaren Grassle - actress
Karl Wallenda - acrobatKate Capshaw - actressKate Jackson - actressKirby Puckett - athleteKirk Cameron - actorKirstie Alley - actressKris Kristofferson - singerKurt Vonnegut - authorLinda Ronstadt - singerLoni Anderson - actressLouis Gossett, Jr - actor.Magic Johnson - athleteMarcia Wallace - actressMarie Osmond - singerMaury Povich - news anchor
Mercedes Ruehl - actressMia Farrow - actressMichelle Pfeiffer - actressNatalie Williams - athleteNell Carter - entertainerNicole Kidman - actressOscar de la Renta - designerOzzy (and Sharon) Osbourne - musicianParker Stevenson - actorPatti LaBelle - singerPaul Newman - actorPaula Poundstone - comedianPearl Bailey - singerPeter Falk - actorPresident Ronald Reagan - politicianRegina Belle - singerRichard King Mellon - financierRobert Fulghum - writerRosie O'Donnell - actressRoy Rogers - entertainerSally Jessy Raphaël - talk show hostSammy Davis, Jr. - entertainerSen. Jesse Helms - politicianSen. John McCain - politicianSen. Lloyd Bentsen - politicianSen. Paul Simon - politicianSen. Paull H. Shin - politicianSen. Kay Bailey Hutchinson - TexasSharon Stone - actressSir Christopher Guest - actorStephen Spielberg - film directorSteven Curtis Chapman - Christian musicianSusan Ruttan - actressTaurean Blacque - actorTed Danson - actorTeri Garr - actressTom Cruise - actorValerie Harper - actressWalt (and Lily) Disney - founder of DisneylandWilliam Delahunt - politicianWillie Mays - athlete

2006-01-01T01:39:00.000-06:00

I started thinking again about how you really fall in love with your children and i found this on another site - it was so touching:

I don't care if they are biological or adopted, I think it really is a process and it really does not happen overnight. I have heard all kinds of things on boards....from worries that they won't bond to an adopted child like a biological child to no worries that they will bond to a child and that it will happen instantaneously. I think what bonds you to a child is experience. It is not the biological tie. I also think you need to be somewhat prepared to not instantly bond with your child as it is a process.We fall in love with our children through shared experiences. We fall in love with them through caring for them through all their sleepless nights and sick days and the times that they fell down and got "owies". We fall in love with them for teaching us about ourselves and selflessness. We fall in love with them for their goofy laughter and spontaneousness and their ability to bring our young selves out. We fall in love with them for their compassion and innocence. We fall in love with them for their openness...for their chance to be little, to be young, to love life to the fullest.

2006-01-01T01:07:00.000-06:00

Another step.....

We signed the papers for the loan today. $25,000 to make sure, but it won't be that much. It seems a little more real every step.

2005-12-30T11:05:00.000-06:00

I finished the last page with a picture of us and a lot of quotes alkl around the picture and the outsede of the page - it's cute - they are all in different fonts.These are the quotes:

God loves each of us as if there were only one of us. ~St. Augustine

God is the perfect poet. ~Robert Browning

Life is God's novel. Let him write it. ~Isaac Bashevis Singer

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. ~Walt Streightiff

Try to learn something about everything and everything about something. ~T.H.Huxley

Happiness is a direction, not a place. ~Sydney J. Harris

Do not train a child to learn by force or harshness but direct them to it by what amuses their minds, so that you may be better able to discover with accuracy the peculiar bent of the genius of each. ~Plato

We cannot fashion our children after our desires, we must have them and love them as God has given them to us. ~Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

2005-12-28T09:06:00.000-06:00

This will be the Baby's room....

If it's a girl we will keep all the flowers and frills. If it's a boy we will do something with sports....

basketballs are orange aren't they?

2005-12-27T22:35:00.000-06:00

MOTHER'S Touch

My mother is going to start an afgan for the baby...she's so excited. She asked my for the colors for the baby's room and showed me the pattern. It's really weird.....she's been waiting a long time to do this....can't wait to see it!

2005-12-27T22:19:00.000-06:00

We will have to find out who will watch our baby when he/she is placed with us. I don't know and i want to put it off as long as possible. I am hoping that our old pastors's wife can do it or our new neighbor (that would be ideal). Otherwise we are talking about day care and i really don't like that idea. Anyway, since not that many people know about the adoption- no one else is giving me any suggestions.
I just figure it will all work out....

2005-12-24T17:57:00.000-06:00

ALMOST

We turned in our profile and had our last homestudy. The homestudy went great and everything is just fine. We just needed some feedback from Jo and Shirley about fixing whatever didn't work on the profile. There is a big list - but mostly misspelled words - surpize surprize!!! (hehe). So we will fix - get about 6 copies (for about $250-$300) and then turn those in for abour $4500....yikes! Then it's just the waiting!!

2005-12-18T00:18:00.000-06:00

6 copies!!!!!!

I went to Kinkos and got a good copy of my profile - in a spiral binder - looks pretty good really but cost $25(just for the sample) She told me 6 of them laminated will be $230!!! There is so much pressure to make something that someone will like - do we have enough about ourselves - do the pictures look good of us - do they make us look like nice, good parents-does our house look good enough......and on and on.
Once that is approved all we ahve to do is wait......the hardest part that i have no control over.
Then when we get picked i have to watch as a girl/woman has to hand over their child to total strangers. I don't know if i can be in the room when that happens......i am already a mess. This isn't like handing over the title and keys to your car and watching someone drive off, this is so much more....too emotional. Sometimes i wish the child was in an orphanage so we would not have to witness such an act of......what? Bravery? self-lessness? selfishness?

2005-12-15T09:35:00.000-06:00

Okay, i think the profile may be done. All but for a nice poem on the back.....don't know where to find that but i'm looking. I think i'll take it to a Kinkos and have them color copy it to see what it will look like.....SO much pressure. How do you show how wonderful you are in 10-15 pages?? I know what you are thinking - one picture of me and they will know how wonderful i am....but it's probably not that simple with strangers..... (lol)

2005-12-12T22:01:00.000-06:00

WHat Is TOday?????

Oh my - it's been forever since i have even had time to look at this! I have been running around like a lunatic. I have worked dinner theater, shopped - taken my seniors on trips and had a concert. I will work 6 more times in 10 days, do a senior concert, take two trips and finally be put into a padded cell!

I got all my Christmas shopping done (except for my dad) TONIGHT. I started at 4:30 and just got home at 10pm. I am so proud that it's done now i just have to wrap - only if i could do it in my sleep.

On top of everything, my shoulder is KILLING me, i can't stop coughing and....and.....I'm sure there's more but i'm too tired to think about it.

One more home study on the 22nd and we will be done with that part....we will also hand over the first big check. I have deposited the amount in the bank from my secret stash so it won't be such a shock but i think the writing of the check will be just as much of a shock as it was to count out all that cash and put it in the bank......now i have to finish the profile.

whew! If i make it through December without keeling over....i'm good.

PS - AND i took a group to Nashville for three days &&& decorated the house! (see PIC below)

2005-12-04T15:59:00.000-06:00

And they think we're crazy???

Scientologists believe that most human problems. can be traced to lingering spirits of an extraterrestrial people massacred by their ruler, Xenu, over 75 million years ago. These spirits attach themselves by "clusters" to individuals in the contemporary world, causing spiritual harm and negatively influencing the lives of their hosts.

Weird stuff huh? That ain't the half of it. This "religion" was started by a failed science fiction writer (you can tell by his writings about aliens)Ron L. Hubbard....and so he started his own religion. But it sure has attracted a lot of famous followers in Hollywood with ALOT of money.

Michael Pattinson was with the "church" for over 20 years and came out telling all. Anyone can google his name and find out his story...it's pretty interesting.
This copied from:
http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2005/12/02/1133422108779.html
Former Scientologists familiar with Hubbard's teachings on reincarnation say the symbol marks a "return point" so loyal staff members know where they can find the founder's works when they travel here in the future from other places in the universe.
"As a lifetime staff member, you sign a billion-year contract. It's not just symbolic," said Bruce Hines, who spent 30 years in Scientology but is now critical of it. "You know you are coming back and you will defend the movement no matter what … The fact that they would etch this into the desert to be seen from space, it fits into the whole ideology."
Scientology traces most of mankind's woes to an evil alien lord named Xenu, a galactic holocaust perpetrated 75 million years ago and the field of psychiatry. (The latter is a particular concern, as all of America now knows, of the actor Tom Cruise.)
The church maintains two other vaults, in California, to preserve Hubbard's materials and words, according to Hines and another former staff member who also quit a couple of years ago, Chuck Beatty.
"The whole purpose of putting these teachings in the underground vaults was expressly so that in the event that everything gets wiped out somehow, someone would be willing to locate them and they would still be there," says Beatty, who spent 28 years in Scientology. Some loyalists are given the "super-duper confidential" job of coming back to Earth in the far-off future, he adds.

2005-12-02T08:13:00.000-06:00

Dreaming of money

I had a dream that we were in a church (very contemporary) and they let go balloons with eggs attached (plastic Easter eggs). No one really knew what was going on but i had just been told about this from someone else - i knew there were prizes in the eggs. Some had just candy and some had money. I grabbed one and all i had was candy. One woman found $80. Somehow i got distracted and i thought they were all gone. Then someone told me thery were still looking around for them in the back. I walked down the hallways and didn't see anyone until i came across a small classroom where there were three young girls playing. I looked in and saw 4 balloons that had come to rest (with the eggs) on the floor. I walked in and asked if they knew about them and they were totally clueless. I thought i better be nice and share - even though my instincts were to take them and run. I watched the kids open theirs and they all got candy. I opened mine and saw cash---i was so excited. I shuffled through and even saw a 1000 bill...i had to look twice at that. I didn't want to make a big deal out of it so i pocketed the money and got out of there. I kept trying to stop and count it and kept getting disrupted. I kept estimating $6,000, $8,000 and someone said one of the eggs had a quarted of a million dollars and i WOKE UP! (wishful thinking?, a preminition? delusional?.....)

2005-11-29T19:48:00.000-06:00

Abortion Insanity!

I just came across a Timesonline by Lois Rogers. It is discussing the recent reports that up to 50 babies a year are born alive after botched National Health Service abortions. It is important to note that the report is of NHS provided abortions only and does not cover private health care abortions.According to the article, babies aborted after 21 weeks and six days of gestation should have their hearts stopped by an injection of potassium chloride before being delivered to avoid being delivered alive and well.This is absolute insanity!A group of doctors actually sat down and decided that it is morally wrong to allow a child to die after inducing premature labor, but it is fine to inject poison into the heart of an unborn child then induce labor.What in the world is going on! We are only a few short steps away from Adolph Hitler’s gas chambers.To add insult to injury, these murders are being paid for by the British people. If you pay taxes in the U.K. you are indirectly paying for this horrific procedure.Abortion is not a political issue. It is a moral issue. I trust my Christian brothers and sisters in the U.K. are engaged in seeing this reprehensible procedure stopped.

2005-11-29T08:53:00.000-06:00

Home study #2 Complete!

Last night we finished #2 homestudy. It was a lot of questions that we could have answered on the phone. Your family growing up, your home life, how you were disciplined, were you loved...all that sort of thing. We are two of the most well adjusted, normal people....we are very blessed. There aren't many people who can say there was no abuse, no divorce, no disfunction....we should be perfect people right? But still, on paper we sound GREAT!

Now all we have to do is finish our profile, do homestudy #3 and wait!

2005-11-27T22:04:00.000-06:00

People have nutty ideas!

Okay - i know there are some weird things, velcro being one of them. But, there are some freaky things for which there is no explanation. I was reading about Edgar Cayce (www.edgarcayce.org) and it's just too bizarre. What about Mike the headless chicken? My seniors remember hearing about this....(http://www.miketheheadlesschicken.org) I can't get over this one.
there are so many others....like the KKK and the people who believe in the DiVinci Code stuff. I guess there are just too many wonders in a fallen world....other people's folly keeps me amused and i guess, if nothing else, it's good for that.

2005-11-26T21:54:00.000-06:00

I have lost my voice.....again!

What is the reason for this always happening? Last time this happened it was 15 days without beling able to make a sound....Is God telling me to shut up? Is He trying to get me to appreciate what i have - that's why i believe He lets my nose get stuffed up.....how many times have you taken a deep breath through your nose and thought twice about it?...NO - but you THANK GOD when you get a breakthough in your stuffy nose....am i right??? When you finally start to blow the most horrific stuff out of you - who would have thought you would rejoice?

God is telling me to use my words more wisely ---and so i shall.

2005-11-24T10:36:00.000-06:00

Thoughts in my head.....

What is the deal with the big balloons that look like cartoon caracters? Holidays in the US have become weird.

I saw a Christmas tree up on the day before Halloween, isn't that illegal?? It should be.

Poor turkeys, they don't get much attention the rest of the year then all of a sudden they are in demand. They must be thinking "this is great, people only really like the chickens"..... then WHAM.

Christmas isn't about anything but presents anymore. I say we all celebrate Christmas like it should be - Jesus' birthday....carols etc. Make a great cake or dessert and sing a special Christmas birthday song. Then on February 14 -"the day of love" we all give eachother presents..... or everyone can just give me presents....whatever

2005-11-23T14:51:00.000-06:00

I HATE DENTISTS

Who likes these guys? You have to be sick, demented and crazy to actually want to see the dentist---that's like enjoying your GYN exam.

I've been seeing the same dentist since i was three years old. My mother took me with my brothers so i "wouldn't be afraid of the dentist". He was getting married that year.... I had two cavities.

That's where it all started. By five i had five fillings and the dentist was buying a house. By six i had a crown on a baby tooth. That's the year my dentist's twins were born. Do you see a pattern here? I used to hide under the dining room table the day of my dental appointment thinking they may just forget about me if i wasn't seen. Sooner ot later they would have to drag me out crying.

Now his son is my dentist and i remind him every visit how my mouth put him through dental school and he better treat it nicely. He just had his first baby and guess what? I have two cavities!

2005-11-19T00:10:00.000-06:00

Walk the Line

If you haven't seen it make sure you do! I never knew country music - i guess Johnny Cash wasn't country though because he toured with Elvis, Jerry Lee Lewis, and some others - but Marrying June Carter i guess he went more to country music ....anyway, Jaquin Pheonix did an awesome job and so did Reese Witherspoon - they sang!!! It was a very good movie.....

Got Molly's page done on the profile - did it at work....my printer is so bad here i guess all the work i've done is in vain.

2005-11-17T08:14:00.000-06:00

Did you ever notice that your perspective on things change when it hits close to home? A good example is when people talk about how bad the police are and you happen to be related to a good cop - you don't appreciate how this person is lumping all of the policemen in a big group. The same goes about Everyone i'm sure - but my experience is with Iraqi people ( "those Arabs" as some of the seniors call them) They are all bad in some people's books but they are all people and not all bad. I will tell you the family i know loves thier family, cares about other people and wants a happy life. There are those people that are bad in all races and religions. I got an e-mail that was harsh but never the less -it captures what a lot of people are feeling. I just have to keep in mind that i cannot put ALL Iraqis in these catagories.....but the one's they are talking about are BAD.

The lady who wrote this letter is Pam Foster of Pamela Foster and Associates in Atlanta. She's been in business since 1980 doing interior design and home planning. She recently wrote a letter to a family member serving in Iraq.

WHAT'S ALL THE FUSS?
"Are we fighting a war on terror or aren't we? Was it or was it not started by Islamic people who brought it to our shores on September 11, 2001? Were people from all over the world, mostly Americans, not brutally murdered that day, in downtown Manhattan, across the Potomac from our Nation's capitol and in a field in Pennsylvania? Did nearly three thousand men, women and children die a horrible, burning or crushing death that day, or didn't they? And I'm supposed to care that a copy of the Koran was "desecrated" when an overworked American soldier kicked it or got it wet? Well, I don't. I don't care at all.

I'll start caring when Osama bin Laden turns himself in and repents for incinerating all those innocent people on 9/11.

I'll care about the Koran when the fanatics in the Middle East start caring about the Holy Bible, the mere possession of which is a crime inSaudi Arabia.

I'll care when Abu Musab al-Zarqawi tells the world he is sorry for hacking off Nick Berg's head while Berg screamed through his gurgling,slashed throat.

I'll care when the cowardly so-called "insurgents" in Iraq come out and fight like men instead of disrespecting their own religion by hiding in mosques.

I'll care when the mindless zealots who blow themselves up in search of nirvana care about the innocent children within range of their suicide bombs.

I'll care when the American media stops pretending that their First Amendment liberties are somehow derived from international law instead ofthe United States Constitution's Bill of Rights.

In the meantime, when I hear a story about a brave marine roughing up anIraqi terrorist to obtain information, know this: I don't care.When I see a fuzzy photo of a pile of naked Iraqi prisoners who have been humiliated in what amounts to a college hazing incident, rest assured that I don't care. When I see a wounded terrorist get shot in the head when he is told not to move because he might be booby-trapped, you can take it to the bank that I don't care. When I hear that a prisoner, who was issued a Koran and a prayer mat, and fed "special" food that is paid for by my tax dollars, is complaining that his holy book is being "mishandled," you can absolutely believe in your heart of hearts that I don't care. And oh, by the way, I've noticed that sometimes it's spelled "Koran" andother times "Quran." Well, Jimmy Crack Corn and -- you guessed it, I could not have said this any better myself! Sooner or later the people responsible for this ridiculous behavior will get the message - we don't care about them! If you don't agree, i'm sorry but please don't complain when more atrocities committed by radical Muslims happen here in our great country."

2005-11-14T21:08:00.000-06:00

PARTY AT MY HOUSE!!!!

I want to have a few people over every night for a week - now that my house is clean - the homevisit is over and i don't want to waste this!!!

The home study was 2 hours but it didn't seem that long. She was like a neighbor or relative dropping by for a little visit. She is very nice and wanted to make us as comfortable as we wanted her to be. Easy questions this time around and we saw some profile examples - mine is boring and needs a lot of work!

WHEW! Glad that's over!!!!!!!!

2005-11-13T22:36:00.000-06:00

My House is CLEEEEEEN!!!!

I am crosseyed! I have spent the last three days (and little things before that) CLEANING. My house looks FABULOUS! I am having people over every night for the next week so this is not wasted.....then back to normal life. I tried to not HIDE things like i know people do. It reminds me of the guy who opens the closet to have everything fall out and bury him. I really tried not to.....there are a few things hidden WAY beneath my bed though.

I even steamcleaned the stairs - they were hideous....it's time to recover those puppies....we are talkin DIRTEEEEEE! the water was black from cleaning 4 steps. Now don't get me wrong - it wasn't like walking on a dirt floor but YUCK!

So tomorrow night is the first Home study. I really am not nervous now everything is clean. I have been very bossy to T and told him not to sit anywhere, get crumbs anywhere, set anything down or move anything but it will be a miracle if everything stays this clean just until tomorrow night..............keeping my fingers crossed and praying everything goes great!

2005-11-09T16:31:00.000-06:00

Home Study

Okay, our first home study is Monday. That doesn't give me a lot of time to try to look perfect. But, i am going to try to be ouselves and not go nuts. I want to clean up the house but only like some friends are coming for dinner. I'm not going to make it look sterile. I go home every night intent on cleaning and i'm exhausted and my collar bone hurts so i do just a little bit ---i'm sure glad i am off Friday and i have the whole weekend. I have a feeling that the closets will be full (she doesn't open closets) i know that is something i said i would never do but i'm desperate to look like a great mother!!!Clean, clean, clean!

2005-11-08T11:42:00.000-06:00

Well, I have a real baseball injury.....

I went to see the doctor and T hugged me so tight when Pujols hit his home run on October 17th 2005, that he dislocated my collar bone and now it is sprained. The Dr. said he usually only sees this problem in baseball related injuries.....and i said "this IS a baseball related injury!"

Don't worry, I plan on milking this for all it's worth....but i hope T doesn't stop hugging me altogether....i just hope he's a little more gentle about it.

You live and learn - who knew i was so delicate!?

2005-11-06T22:30:00.000-06:00

I just realized that i am middle-aged.........where has my life gone???? People my age have children that are late teens..............i'm a little freaked out.

Mid-life is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down.

This gives us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired mustache

How will people look at us when we have a baby in our arms and my husband has white hair? I will be the oldest soccermom and everyone will ask if i'm there to see my grandkids......who do we think we are? These are just a few of my thought today on being old parents....

2005-11-04T15:00:00.000-06:00

You should never have to watch anyone bury your child. I don't care if that child is an infant, 22, 33, 44 or 60. Parents should not have to go through that.

T's friend lost their son this past weekend in a car accident, he was 28.

B walked in yesterday at work and said his daughter was dead, he couldn't work and he walked out. We didn't know much about his family but knew he was only in his 60s, his daughter couldn't be that old.
Today i found out her oldest of three young sons came home from school and threw his bag on the couch as he yelled into the house that he was going outside to play. When he didn't get an answer he looked around and found his mom dead on the floor, her face all swollen and her eyes filled with blood. What a horrible thing to have to rememebr for the rest of his life. I feel so heartbroken for them.

2005-11-03T14:12:00.000-06:00

K had a dream i got "THE CALL". Not to be a nun but to pick up a baby! Just after all the paperwork was finished, we had to drive far away......

I told her it was prophetic----let's hope so!

2005-11-02T13:50:00.000-06:00

Life is short

Americans do not usually live in fear of their lives minute to minute, hour to hour. We have car accidents, falls, sickness and all sorts of unexplained things going on in the world all the time but somehow we all think we are immune here in the US, until it happens. One minute we are doing fine - the next we can get a phone call someone has died or fallen ill or been hurt.

People in war torn countries are so used to bad things happening they handle these things much better. When the subway was bombed in London - bleeding people were helped from the wreckage calm as could be and speaking in a calm manner about the tradgedy. Here in the US there would have been screaming, panic, crying, people jumping into the wreckage claiming to have been another victim - terrible.

We should live out lives like everyday may be the last for us, our loved ones or the people around us. Make memories every day---have experiences everywhere you go!

2005-11-01T15:55:00.000-06:00

It's NOT funny!

Why does Halloween always have to be cold and rainy!!!???? These poor kids have looked forward to this for months and then what a mess they had to be in! We trudged around in the pouring rain for 2 hours.....candy is not that important is it? I guess it is....there were an aweful lot of drenched little children out there. Ponchos, umbrellas and rainhats were the costumes....

I love these girls like they are mine.......

It's funny that jokes are so language based. Jokes DO NOT translate and cannot be told to any degree of funniness when you don't "get it".

Knock, Knock, who's there?, Boo, Boo Who? Don't cry---simple right?
Well when you don't understand what Boohoo is, it doesn't make any sense. In another language the sound may be wahwah or eaweaw - so Boo Who doesn't sound like anything but boo who.

So to an Iraqi little girl it's "nock, nock, who there? poo, who poo? What's the rest?"

Shakespear's comedies are the same way - we don't find them very funny anymore unless we live in 16th century land. All the jokes are based on things then.....while the tragedies live on as the great works because sadness and grief are the same from language to language and from age to age..... Interesting

2005-10-31T13:44:00.000-06:00

Where have I been??

My goodness, my last blog was on October 21st and it's the 31st!! Where have i been? Well, we visited some relatives in another city and had SO much fun! K watched Molly (Thank you K) and we flew (best thing in the world) instead of driving for HOURS AND HOURS we were there in less than two! We saw an NBA game - lots of fun, we went to a theme park and i went to a strip club!

Okay, it's not what you are thinking.....a group of ladies from T's cousin's church go once a month on a Saturday (their slowest time) to a 24 hour stip club. It's a well known place in the city and they actually are also known for their burgers...haha. It's really a wonderful thing that these ladies do - they bring the stippers little gifts and let them know they are loved even though they are where they are. They have developed a relationship with them and actually get to pray with them if they want to. They are not judgemental, they do not yell at them or tell them they are bad people. They actually already know they are not in a great place in their lives - they just need people to believe in them and show them love the right way. As difficult as it was to sit and have lunch in a stip club (with woman stripping on the stage mind you), it was amazing to see girls coming over and hugging these women who pray for them daily as well as getting prayed for in the middle of everything going on.

2005-10-21T16:06:00.000-05:00

Funeral Anyone?

I grew up in funeral homes. My granfather had 12 borthers and sisters and there was always somebody that was being buried from here or there. The thing is - no two funeral parlors are the same.....they may be now but not then. Some had rooms for smoking in the back and they would have enough room to play around a little and sometimes they would have free coffee for the adults and free hot chocolate for others. Some even had candy and soda machines....these were the best. As a kid i remember a phone call would come in and who would hear your parent saying a lot of comforting things and then the name of a funeral home. I would either be happy or depressed about the name of the place - knowing one may or may not have the kid essentials. Never mind someone that was related to us died, but we aren't getting to go to the funeral home with the nice snack machine? Yikes

2005-10-21T14:22:00.000-05:00

Even though they STILL have not approved us, we got an okay to start our home study. They have been so busy - it hasn't been able to go through all the channels yet......I'm nerveous! It's been okay saying that it was going to be - but to actually schedual it is frightening!

2005-10-20T13:54:00.000-05:00

We both have baseball injuries!

When Albert Pujols hit a homerun on Monday, October 17th to help the Cardinals win the fourth game of the division playoffs....i thought my husband was crazy! After he declared his love for Albert and lost his voice.....he hugged me so hard i think he broke/misplaced/ or popped something. I hurt....

Who knew baseball could be so dangerous in the home?

2005-10-17T22:17:00.000-05:00

Thank Goodness for Bandaides

This is NOT the bride i saw but i did see a bride this weekend who exposed her bandaides (well, one) and i just want to say - Thank goodness for bandaides and mothers who tell.......

2005-10-17T11:19:00.000-05:00

Some People Shouldn't Have Children!

"While Hollywood awaits a due date for Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' baby, one thing is already a known fact — when the baby does arrive, Scientology will play a major role. Tom and Katie are likely to follow the church's "silent birth" guidelines during delivery, which means no music and no talking during the birth, which also means no screaming during the pains of labor. The doctrine also states that newborns cannot be poked or prodded for medical tests or even spoken to for the first seven days of their lives, believing that babies go through so much pain during the birth, they shouldn't have to experience any further discomfort or sensory experience that could return later in life to haunt them."

2005-10-15T09:21:00.000-05:00

BATH Party - Godfather I, II and III

We went to Hussien's last night and we talked about the constitution in Iraq. I asked if he had read it but he said he had only read parts of it. He said he trusts the people who wrote it - "they are very smart people, they know so much and know what's good". I asked him about the Sunni's not liking parts of it and he said "they changed those things for them, they were afraid becuase the constitution was saying that ALL the Bath party was bad and there are many Sunnis who are still in the Bath party . They let that go and changed it to say only the one's who they could prove did a bad thing would be a criminal".
I wanted to know more about the Bath party so I started talking about Hitler and Hussien said - "Hitler fought for his country, he wanted Germany to be great and thought he was doing good for his country....he was crazy but didn't kill his own people like Saddam". I told him that he did - he killed the German jews just like Saddam killed Kurds and Shiite because he thought Sunnis were the only ones that were good. He still thought that Saddam was worse that Hitler because he could kill his own friends if they thought they were in his way or talking bad about him. There are so many similarities.
Then i compared the Bath party to Nazi's - who maybe had some people in it that just "followed the crowd" - but he said "NO, EVERY person in the Bath party is BAD - everyone. I asked if it was like the mob "YES", he shouted - "LIKE THE MOB, you only are in it if you are bad - people who try to get out are killed". It's interesting that Saddam's favorite movie was The GODFATHER!
It was very enlightening and so sad. Now the Bath party is somewhat protected with this new constitution - it sort of gives them a "window" in the new government. scarey!

Saddam's favorite movie was Godfather.......hmmmmm

2005-10-12T15:35:00.000-05:00

I got ARRESTED!

Today i was in jail half the day trying to make bail. It was a "Lock-up" for MDA (Jerry's Kids). I HATE asking people for money but it was a very worthy cause and i'm proud to say i raised almost $600. I had a few checks in the mail when i got back to work....YEAH friends. It's nice to know people can still give after reaching so deep in their pockets for Katrina and other charities.

2005-10-11T10:16:00.000-05:00

I cannot imagine how it feels to be put under so much duress. Whether it is a widow who has lost every family member in the rubble in Pakistan, losing my house and job in New Orleans, watching my child get swept under the water in Tiawan or see my son shot in Iraq.....whatever. I cannot put myself in their shoes - i have no idea what they are feeling or going through. I have never had to live under such dire circumbstances and pray i never have to. i read a quote on another blog....

"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.

That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes."

No one would actually put themselves in another's place anymore. People are all selfish and could care less how other people feel. I think the world is coming to an end.

2005-10-10T20:37:00.000-05:00

.....PRODUCE A PROFILE.....

This sounds like something the government does with criminals, murderers, childmolesters and terrorists. Yes, that's exactly how i feel......except we have to make our own profile so people can see how wonderful, not aweful, we are. Why do we have to prove ourselves, make us sound worthy and faithful to an outside world? Granted, a person will hand over a living, breathing human being they produced and expect us to be good to it. One question......why would we go through all this trouble if we planned on not being good to this child???? Do child molesters and criminals go through all this....? NO - they kidnap children if they want one for bad purposes. SO, what does this profile need to be???? I realize we must tell the truth but who shows pictures of anything bad? - Do they want pictures of my quirks and weirdnesses......"sheet over, sheet over", washing my hair with only conditioner, eating absolutely nothing that crumbles in the bed?
They cannot expect the whole truth.....but are we that bad? Do they need to know the slight weirdness? They need to know we have good hearts, that God will be #1 and we will be fun parents.....right? They already know we have gone through all this stuff right?? How bad can we be?
I just don't want to put too much pressure on myself (T sits back and lets me do my "magic") If it fails it will be my fault, if it doesn't, more power to both of us!
Maybe i'll put this picture on the front ---it's how i feel.......

2005-10-09T19:24:00.000-05:00

A House Tour is Like.....

I thought letting people walk through your house would be like letting people see you in your underwear......everything exposed and hanging out. But it's more like parading down a runway in a beautiful, glittery gown. You are primped and puckered and rouged and no one sees the flaws. However, there is an exception to that....... If you are in this high brow fashion show and do not have a fancy gown but a tacky eighties jumpsuit that you believe is gorgeous, a pair of 5 inch heels that glow in the dark and a big fro hat that lights up and plays Jingle Bells - be ready for ridicule. You may think you are fabulous but people are talking. That's one reason i would never let people walk through my house. I don't want to be the one they all make fun of behind my back.....i want to wear my costumes without the attention.....let them talk about you not me......:)

2005-10-06T22:38:00.000-05:00

It's already Thursday, time goes by so fast! I talked to the agency today because i hadn't heard from them in so long. Our case worker had told me that it would be two weeks and it's been SO long i was beginning to worry. She said they have 7 babies in forster care right now and things are pretty crazy. She said she would put a priority sticker on it and have the commitee look at it and send out the profile information so we could start working on it. It's something that i want to happen right away, a long time from now or maybe just something i dream about. Our lives will be so different that i am having a little anxiety (i HATE change).....but i know i love children and babies and even though i cannot imagine us with a child of our own i am praying that it will happen. I never, as a child, pictured myself with my own children or a family---i wonder what that's all about? Never really pictured myself as married and that happened so.......

2005-10-04T08:29:00.000-05:00

JJ's dad is here from Tamil, India and he has never been anywhere until coming here to America. What a shock it must be for him! He went to the University Campus with K and saw the fountains.....he asked "is that drinking water?" and she said "i guess so, it's clean, you could drink it" then he asked if people could bath in the fountain......"no, you would probably get in trouble for doing that, it's just for looking nice---making the campus more appealing". This was upsetting to him. In India water is very precious and NEVER wasted. She thought he would faint when he saw a guy squirting off the sidewalk......

2005-10-03T15:23:00.000-05:00

Sounds Like a Bad Movie

Mary was a secretary from Pennsylvania. She attended a party made up of six married men and six single women, crowded into a small living room. There was plenty of alcohol, the host reports buying three half gallons of vodka, four fifths of scotch, two bottles of rum and two cases of beer for the party. After midnight everyone was leaving and one of the married men left with Mary even though his license had been expired for five months and he had numerous amounts of warrants out for reckless driving, running red-lights and speeding. He reported later he made a “wrong turn” even though he had taken the same road two times that day) and he ran the car off a small bridge into a pond and the car turned up side down with Mary in it. The man said he was dazed by the accident, laid on the bank for 15 or 20 minutes then, not seeing any lights, decided to walk, run and jog back to the nearest town---yelling all the way. People who lived near the pond said their porch lights could be seen from the bridge and people along the road he said he ran down, slept with their windows open and they never heard a thing. The man who said he walked, ran and jogged all the way to town, went to his hotel room, changed his clothes and went downstairs to complain about a noisy party that was going on (there were eyewitness accounts to this).

The car was discovered by fishermen at 8am the next morning and the police divers found Mary, her head was cocked back, her face pressed into the footwell of the car. She had been alive for nearly two hours after the accident and breathing the air left in an air-pocket. The pond was only 6-8 feet deep. Had the man tried to save her, knock out a window or even gone for help – she could have been saved.

Not only did he NOT go for help, he showed up to meet some colleagues the next morning in a jovial mood. The mood didn’t last long when they told him what the police had found he had them drive him to the police station to report the accident. A week later he arrived in court wearing a neck brace, pleaded guilty to leaving the scene of an accident and was given a two-month suspended sentence and a year's probation.

How would you feel about the injustice of this?? Mary’s parents signed a petition preventing an autopsy…why?

Would you be surprised to find out the man was Ted Kennedy? Mary Jo Kopechne was the girl who died and this all happened at Chappaquiddick, Massachusetts. Too many people have forgotten or were too young to remember. This was an injustice and Ted Kennedy should have been forced to give up politics. His wealthy and influential family changed the rules for him and he still is a “big wig” in the senate. Why did her parents refuse an autopsy? I would like to know……
-Was she pregnant?
-Did she know something about Robert Kennedy’s assassination? (She had been his secretary)
-Who asked those parents to refuse the autopsy? Wouldn’t you want to know about your own daughter’s death?
-How can Ted Kennedy decide laws and be influential in Washington with a murder to his name?
-Why haven't people risen up and said "get out of the senate" years ago???

2005-10-02T18:56:00.000-05:00

God and Jerky

The pastor talked in his sermon about how the word of God is like jerky....you need to chew on it alot and suck all the juice and nourishment out. I love the picture of that. It made me start thinking about metaphores that you would not necessarily go together.
Life is like a nose. You would get bad things out of it but would not get rid of the nose but medicate it - work on it.....sometimes you pick and pick at it until it's sore---sometimes you get something out of the aggravation and sometimes you don't. Most itmes you just take it for granted when it's working well....it's only when it''s not working correctly that you pay attention to getting it back to normal working order. And----without it you would be ugly and miserable.
I'll work on it

2005-10-01T23:44:00.000-05:00

No One Believes Me

No one believes that i am actually shy. I hate meeting new people unless they do most of the talking or my dear hubby is with me. He can charm the skin off a snake. He talks to everyone - store clerks, janitors, people on the street....anyone. I will walk away at a store to try on something and when i get back he has the whole background information on the sales girl. He will probably be in the middle of telling her his life story when i return and i'll interupt to pay for an item and drag him out. I, on the other hand like being alone. I like observing from afar. I wonder why that is....i guess i always feel more comfortable as the outsider. People don't believe i'm shy because i act and sing. What they don't understand is there is no real interaction with anyone. It's an observation of them while i am acting or singing. I still get to observe from afar and not get personal.
.
I do love to act - dress up and be whoever i want to be. I can actually be fun and interesting, mean, dumb and sometimes even funny. I watch people do what they do - guess a little bit about them and never have to share anything of myself. I do what i do and then go home.....no relationships there.

2005-09-29T16:00:00.000-05:00

Mixed Breed

Schnoodle, yorkipoo, puggle, bagel ---sounds like somthing you would get in a jewish deli!
I don't want anyone to call me prejudiced but i am against all this mixing! What happened to pure blood lines? It used to be a "mutt"-- Now i am reading the new "perfect" pet is a labradoodle.

The poor thing reminds me of those guys in the eighties

who went and had their mullet permed.....

2005-09-29T08:39:00.000-05:00

The opposite or the same as Hitler??

I looked at the list of the top 100 banned books from schools....Okay, i don't know all of the books on the list, but I CANNOT believe some of them....some of these are classics for crying out loud! These are the one's i could not believe....

3.I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou (not an Angelou fan but how bad can this be?)
5.The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain (classic - and gives exapmles how balck and white people are basically the same!)
6.Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck (classic - difficult story but come on)
13.The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger (classic)
14.The Giver by Lois Lowry (very interesting science fiction type book - but decent)
23 A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle (very good)
42To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee (classic)
56 Cujo by Stephen King (Scary dog? haha)
57 James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl (they made a cartoon for goodness sakes)
63 Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume (didn't read it growing up but come on....)
71 Lord of the Flies by William Golding (One of the greats)

Now these i understand why they were banned, BAN THEM, BURN THEM......
2.Daddy’s Roommate by Michael Willhoite (eewww!)
11.Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman (double eewww!)
15.It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris (i guess about being gay or bi)
29 The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein (what's new about it??)
19 Sex by Madonna (nothin' new here)

There is NO reson for these last books to be on the shelves in the schools---just because they print them doesn't mean we should drop all common sense and make them available to kids!!!

I'm not saying to actually burn them - sell them in a sleazy little shop where sleazy people go to buy sleazy trash like that. Keep them out of the schools!

2005-09-28T15:26:00.000-05:00

Dancing When You're Old

I never could dance, i did the ballet and tap thing when i was younger. I even took baton lessons and didn't look half bad in my costume (at 7). I didn't really have any dancing experience again until high school and that was the 80's - we really didn't dance as much and jump and flail our arms (when we danced at all - most of the time the girls stood around in a circle and watched the boys in their circle playing the air guitar). Then there was my wedding - but we mostly slow danced and did the eighties jumping and flailing thing. My dear husband and i even took ballroom and while we were there we were GOOD. As soon as we left the building we forgot all we learned. I dance at home when no one is watching but even i don't think i'm very good.
Today we had a group of ladies who range in age from 55 to 78 and they make me feel bad about myself becuase i would love to be able to dance....and i would love to have the figure at their age that these gals have...............They are still having this much fun at their age!
The are known as the Strutters and are very popular....they have danced in Las vegas, Russia, Australia and many many more. Here they are with Savion Glover (greatest tap dancer in the world)

2005-09-27T11:13:00.000-05:00

Monkees and a Pact with the Devil

Who didn't like Davy Jones in the monkees?

....boy have they all changed

Then................ Now

You see how i feel old --- have i changed this much - do i look this aweful?

Then...................... Now

I figure you have to amuse yourself while waiting in this adoption mess - so here are a few more....

Talk about a pact with some evil forces....has Matt Dillion even aged??
Then Now

2005-09-26T21:52:00.000-05:00

Scott Baio has made a
pact with the devil
obviously!

2005-09-26T21:31:00.000-05:00

OH MY GOODNESS!
Bay City Rollers

Rick Springfield - blaaaa

2005-09-25T21:40:00.000-05:00

What were we thinking???

Warning to all young girls who idolize a pop star....

I was distubed and felt quite old today when i saw pictures of a few guys i had up on my wall in my room in the 70's. In the days to come i will show some of their pictures. It is disturbing thinking about their pictures on the wall as they are now....

Leif Garrett and Shaun Cassidy had the perfect feather and boy were they cute...or were we mentally disturbed???

2005-09-25T15:18:00.000-05:00

Iraq and frozen hotdogs

We have friends from Iraq. I have watched the kids grow up the last 7 years and the two older girls are becoming beautiful women. They went to church with us today and i was so nerveous seeing our service through their eyes. How strange it must have been for a muslim to be in church with all the Christian pomp and ceremony. When they sent around the bread and juice cups i could see they were thinking how strange it all was. The people are what they crave--the fellowship---they can feel the love of Jesus coming through and it is so attractive to them....I love those kids and that family, they are so much a part of us yet so very different.

K got sick eating a frozen hotdog but refuses to take pepto bismo - K, if you are reading this i hope you feel better and you got some pepto - no more eating old hotdogs - no matter how frozen they have been!

2005-09-22T11:41:00.000-05:00

I have over 100 bites!

Last night after i took a shower i wondered how i would know if i woke up with more bites - i still couldn't figure out what these things were. I thought if it were fleas i would have seen them in my house, if they were chiggers or spiders i would have just been bitten to have the marks show up on Tuesday and Wednesday. So, i cicled every bite with pen. If there were more the next day i would know it. I will tell you - i looked so funny when i was finished circling. I thought about taking a picture but didn't want to take a chance of anyone but me seeing it. You could definetly see a pattern. You could almost trace were these bugs traveled on me. EEWWW....it gives me the creeps!!
So, today i talked to a girl who swears they are chigger bites. She said I could have gotten the bites on Sunday and they show up a few days later.....that would be fantastic - that means i DO NOT have bugs in my house. I'm getting a little paranoid and thinking that coffee flecks (that are everywhere after DH makes coffee every morning) are little bugs and have to inspect them carefully.

I have always attracted bugs - is it my warmth? Mt Sweet blood? My winning personality? or does it have something to do with my "magnetism" (the reason i stop watches and other electronic devices)?

I must sign off for a full body scratch!

2005-09-21T09:05:00.000-05:00

So I was thinking....i had two possible birthmothers that might have been interested in giving us their child and then there was the agency. So now we're just counting on the agency - who knows how long it will take - i want to me a mother by mother's day----i don't want to spend one more mother's day with empty arms......